MLM and Mormons

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      mormonite
      Participant

      I saw this on the LDSFiles humor forum. Funny.

      MLM = Mormons Losing Money

      Utah, highest MLM concentration in the world = Utah, highest bankruptcy rates in America

      What do you get when you put a large group of returned missionaries and their wives together in a big meeting with cookies and songs and high profile speakers?

      It’s not a missionary reunion. It’s a Tahitian Noni conference.

      Who have you just met when you are sitting in a church bathroom stall and someone slips a business card under the door?

      Your future upline.

      -Your companion from the mission calls you up out of the blue 6 years after you returned. He acts chummy with you and talks like you are best friends. Then he says it, “You know, you sure are a focused and determined individual. I want you to come to a meeting with me!”

      Translation: 6 years ago when I got home from my mission I decided I wanted to work very little and yet still be able to be filthy stinking rich. So after my part time job at Wendys for 3 months and after surviving only one month selling security systems in the ghetto in Georgia last summer, I decided to join an MLM and strike it Rich with a capital R. And since you are someone who is actually going to school and you have a real job and goals and plans for the rest of your life, I thought that you could spend another 10-20 hours a week working under me so that I can benefit from your determination and success.

      Correct response: “No thanks, but I’ll see you at the mission conference if you decide to finally come.”

      And last but not least, Believe, a comedy about Multi Level Marketing coming out in Utah April 20

      website: http://www.believethemovie.com

      Watch the video clips. They look funny.

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